Finders Keepers or Stealing.
Definition of Stealing: 391 Stealing (Criminal Code Queensland) (1) A person who fraudulently takes anything capable of being stolen, or fraudulently converts to the person's own use or to the use of any other person anything capable of being stolen, is said to steal that thing.
Now how does this lead to a golf story?
I was playing recently at Boomerang Farm on the Gold Coast. On the last hole of the 9-hole course, I left behind a gap wedge, just off the green. I didn’t discover the loss until two days later when going to play at another course. I then had a vivid recall of how and where I left it. I called the course that day but after a search of likely places in the clubhouse I was informed that it wasn’t there. I was advised to check back in after a week or so just in case.
Full disclosure: I haven’t been overly happy with this wedge, a 48° Callaway worth around $200. So I searched a few Gold Coast retailers and settled for a Vokey 50° SM8 at $230. A side story is that wedges are currently in very short supply in Australia with apparently Acushnet (Titleist brand owner) sending clubs back to the US to meet demand over there. Months of back-orders on Titleist and Taylor Made…just sayin’.
So it made me ponder the current state of play in Golf.
Golf as we all know is a game of honesty, probably one of the few sports left where a player calls a penalty on themselves. Can you remember when batsmen walked or when players never argued with a referee. Today professional sports stars are highly paid prima donnas who at the very least probably have a certificate on their wall from the local Stunt Academy. How to fall in 101 ways without really injuring yourself.
Golf is not immune to cheating either, at least at club level, and seemingly on the rise. Anecdotally I believe it is almost impossible to win a nearest the pin in some clubs when competing against certain players. I’m going no further than that. Others can’t count it seems: a high official from our local PGA has told me it is rife in this country, especially in the elite junior ranks. I must be naïve as this really shocked me.
“Rules are for the guidance of the intelligent but the blind obedience of fools”
On an aside, I play at a club with a very casual approach to the rules. I like to think that the maxim is that “Rules are for the guidance of the intelligent but the blind obedience of fools.” If this is true then I can suggest that we must have the members with the highest IQ in the country. But it is OK, many are on the north side of 24 handicap and the most competitive part is the NTP’s… where I have heard no stories of cheating. A blind eye is turned however to most of the nit-picking rules which at the end of the day rarely make a lot of difference to the player’s final score. As an example, does it really matter if a penalty drop is two club lengths from the point it crossed the boundary or will “over there” be good enough. Chances are the player will chunk the next shot back into the water hazard. So we don’t dwell too much on the exactitudes of the game. After all, an 8 or 9 doesn’t warrant sweating the small stuff.
The professional game is worse, it is alleged.. Championships are rigged right up to and including the Majors. At least, so says Miles Mathis, a former elite grade player from the United States. He is quite an orator on many subjects with golf popping up on his website from time to time. He has interesting articles on the recent US Open, on Nicklaus’s win at Augusta in 1986 and several on Tiger Woods. http://mileswmathis.com/updates.html All very controversial but since nobody is suing him, perhaps there is truth in there.
And TRUTH is where this story began. What is an acceptable theft on the golf course.
Q. Do you keep tees you find on the course?
A. Yes. universal I believe most do and nobody worries about the “small stuff”.
Q. Do you keep found balls, or do you call over the players searching on the adjacent hole?
A. Line ball (sic) here. Probably keep them (for your kids of course) if you can’t immediately see a likely owner.
Q. What about that nice head cover or putter cover?
A. Now we are crossing the line I think. A small survey of 3 yesterday tells me that everyone would hand them in!
Q. So what about the found club?
A. I would like to think that most people will offer it up to the group in front if the opportunity arises on the course or hand it in to the Pro’s shop on the completion of their round.
I enjoyed David Feherty’s (a fellow Ulsterman) comment at the US Open when Harris English lost his ball at the first hole on the final day. He said that the rough was so long that you could lose your whole bag of clubs and caddie in there.
But all joking aside, think again. Don’t steal other people’s valuable clubs. It is easy to get distracted and walk off without your club, especially if you were within chipping range of the green. Everybody has done it at some time or other. Please do the right thing. It’s not worth the Karma. It’s a real thing, you know. It’s a Law of the Universe just as much as gravity is. And it is a criminal offence to boot.
I would encourage clubs to display a warning notice. How about:
Club Lifters will be Prosecuted!!
Maybe we can start #GCM (Golf Clubs Matter…especially to their owners)